10 Ways to Know You're Over Your Ex

By Jenna Levy, 17, Staff Writer

Originally Published: Jun 3, 2005

Revised: Jun 27, 2007

I had been dating a guy I really liked for a little over four months. When it suddenly ended, I was devastated. So I came up with this list, with help from friends and teens across the country, that helps you know if you're finally over your ex. Although many of the things on the list are hard to do, they will help. And so will time . . . it heals all wounds.

Photo by Hannah Rosenblum

10. You no longer listen to depressing music while eating tubs of ice cream. The first couple of days after a breakup are the worst. You feel sorry for yourself and listen to depressing "emo" music while crying over junk food.

9. You no longer talk to your ex's friends to find out what she's doing. Nobody knows your ex better than her friends. You've probably become closer to them through your ex, but resist the urge to ask them about her.

8. You no longer dig up old voicemails and e-mails and reminisce. Although it's tempting to save all those mushy "I love you" voicemails/e-mails that remind you of the good ‘ole days, they really need to go. The more things you save that remind you of your ex, the harder it will be to get over him or her.

7. You no longer find yourself talking about your ex with your friends. She used to be all that you would talk about with your friends, but lately you've started talking about other stuff.

6. You no longer go out of your way to see your ex in the halls or in a favorite hangout spot. Admit it. In those first couple of weeks, you'd just "happen" to wind up at her hangout spots or find yourself driving past his house. Again, resist the urge.

5. You no longer check her away messages every 10 minutes. It's enticing to check the away message to see if your ex wrote anything about you or song lyrics that describe a (hopefully depressed) mood, but in order to get over the breakup, stop checking!

4. You no longer talk loudly about other guys/girls around your ex, hoping they hear and become jealous. It's tempting to show your ex that you are over the relationship, even if you're not. Bad idea. This can create hard feelings or, worse, reveal that you're putting on an act. When you stop caring what your ex thinks about your life, you can move on.

3. You go out on a date with someone else, have a good time, and manage not to think about your ex for a good three hours! It's hard to think about going out with someone else when you're so hung up on your ex. But many times, seeing someone new takes your mind off your ex—and sparks a new friendship or relationship.

2. You hear he is seeing someone else, and you're not upset. The most dreaded fallout of breaking up is that your ex will find someone new. But if you can relate to many of the situations on this list, hearing that your ex is dating someone else may not be as unbearable as you had originally thought.

1. You finally take your ex off your buddy list … for good. This may be one of the hardest things to do. Erasing your ex's screen name means you cannot see his or her away messages or profile. Remember, out of sight, out of mind!

Your Comments

tru tru tru !!

Posted by: jucielover on Sep 22nd, 2008 8:18pm

it all tru just work hard and gooo out and have aloot of
fun!!

My Ex Boyfriend

Posted by: hisqueen on Sep 3rd, 2008 12:34am

Hahaha i really wish i could do all ten things, but i know
im still not fixed for the damage and i love loving him even
if it makes me cy. but these are all my new goals :D

Well Im Not Over My Ex

Posted by: jennyboo122292 on Apr 16th, 2008 11:18am

not quite yet. i still think about him, call him and talk to
him. most of those ten things i still do.

Not Always True

Posted by: skye616 on Feb 14th, 2008 10:10pm

it really depends on the relationship.. i was in love (and
know I still am) with my ex and he and i are kinda like best
friends. i still talk to him whenever he can (he's a
'squid') and he calls just to talk whenever possible

Number 1

Posted by: niihn on Feb 11th, 2008 12:27am

...that was the first thing I did. But I had a good
reason...and its still a good reason.

I don't necessarily agree with this list...

Posted by: mishimarie on Jan 15th, 2008 10:28pm

Its not necessary to completely cut off all communication.
I'm over my ex but we still talk all the time - we're best
friends even because I still trust the heck outta him and he
still trusts the heck outta me. I've actually kept in
contact with most exes.

SO OVER HIM!

Posted by: arrow_lakes_cutie on Dec 24th, 2007 8:45am

I don't agree with half of that list. It all depends on how
you feel, and what you feel at the time. You feel you love
him, you love him, but all of a sudden-you hate him?!
Bullsh*t! I believe, either you do or you don't, it just
takes time to realize it. Patience is a virtue, all you have
to do is know your self before you try to find love, because
if you don't-you will have a long list of relationship
disappointments! Trust me-I have been there and I have SO
done that! All it takes, is TIME!

"its over"

Posted by: jujubes18 on Sep 10th, 2007 4:42am

my ex told never to talk to them again. and i didnt for a
few months and got a new b/f but the problem was that i
apprently drove my ex insane and they tried to keep my
current b/f from dating me. i respect my ex as well as any
other person but that pissed me off. i'm over them but my
b/f has not stopped being friends with them and that hurts.
why my ex still holds something against me? no idea but
arent they supposed to be over me?

i dont get this

Posted by: baybiimamaat10 on Aug 31st, 2007 4:09am

why is it that i really cant get over any of my exz even
some guys i aint gone out with but we wz talk n i still do
like all of this stuff when i get the chance bout my last ex
but i got a new dude but i love him but i dont see why i
cant get my ex out my head some times its really hard spesh.
sence we wz together for almost a YEAR bust relationship
untill my new guy me n him 3 months on the 4th lolz n not on
break up or fight. but still what should i do bout my ex
HELPZ

i hate the hard part

Posted by: anavarac on Jul 24th, 2007 12:59am

ive done everything but its just so hard to stop tlking to
them especailly when they wont stop calling just to try and
make u jelous!!!